Kronii
Kronii, my sweet Kronii
would you like some baloney?
or, how about macaroni?
or maybe Rice-a-Roni
Kronii, can I touch you?
Can I also smell you?
What's your favorite brand of soap
and where do you buy shampoo?
Can you tell me
why am I like this?
Can you help me see
something I may have missed
I'm so obsessed with you
'cause you're so beautiful
You're telling me if I don't wanna be this way
All I gotta do is just not be this way
Kronii, my sweet Kronii
Kronii, my sweet Kronii
Do you ever get lonely?
Or cry yourself to sleep?
Or wander alone in the street?
Kronii, can I touch you?
Can I also smell you?
What's your favorite brand of soap
and where do you buy perfume?
Can you tell me
why am I like this?
Can you help me see
something I may have missed
I'm so obsessed with you
'cause you're so beautiful
You're telling me if I don't wanna be this way
All I gotta do is just not be this way
Kronii, my sweet Kronii
Kronii, my sweet Kronii
******************
Day After Day
I comb through the weekly ad, it's not bad
Chicken thighs are pretty cheap this week
I can buy a ten pound bag and make it last
Every week I scrounge up all the change I have
That determines my diet for the week
Survival mode is my permanent state
It's what I deal with day after day after day
It's what I deal with day after day after day after day
Day after day
I blew some cash on the lottery, I didn't win
It was a stupid thing to do
When you've got no hope, it's what you tend to choose
Survival mode is my permanent state
It's what I deal with day after day after day
It's what I deal with day after day after day after day
Shut up with your talk about pulling myself up by my bootstraps
You were born with a silver spoon in your mouth
So spare me your precious advice
Every week I scrounge up all the change I have
That determines my diet for the week
Survival mode is my permanent state
It's what I deal with day after day after day
It's what I deal with day after day after day after day
Day after day
********************
Commute
I'm still in bed and it's half past noon
I see no reason to get up any time soon
I have a job that means nothing to me
Any way you look at it the future's pretty bleak
I'm counting on some kind of disaster to make me feel alive
My commute takes about an hour long
Long way to go just to end up somewhere wrong
Mr. Bus Driver feel free to take a nap
If we plunge off the bridge just say the brakes were pretty bad
I'm counting on some kind of disaster to make me feel alive
I've got some kind of chain around my neck
and it's pulling me down, down
The water keeps rising above my head
I fear I'm gonna drown, drown
I'm calling and calling out for some help
but no one's ever around, 'round
I'm screaming and screaming my lungs out
but I can't seem to make a sound, sound
Looks like I made it home, safe and sound
Maybe my luck would change if I weren't on the ground
Hurricane season is supposed to be bad
A Category 5 should wipe the place off the map
I'm counting on some kind of disaster to make me feel alive
I've got some kind of chain around my neck
and it's pulling me down, down
The water keeps rising above my head
I fear I'm gonna drown, drown
I'm calling and calling out for some help
but no one's ever around, 'round
I'm screaming and screaming my lungs out
but I can't seem to make a sound, sound, sound
********************
vtuber
Ugly boy, what are you doing?
I can see you following me
Don't you know that you don't stand a chance?
With a girl as pretty as me?
Stupid boy, just go on home
Your constant whimpers are bothering me
Don't you know that you're wasting your time
with a girl who's out of your league?
Nerds, weebs, and weeaboos
They all make me so miserable
I just wish they would leave me alone
They need to start living a life of their own
I'm just a vtuber, I love to sing
but I won't be your personal slave
There are things that I want to do
without the stares of nerd boys like you
I want to go to my local cafe
and not have to worry about you sniffing my chair
Or look out my window to see some nerd
going through my trash for a souvenir
Nerds, weebs, and weeaboos
They all make me so miserable
I just wish they would leave me alone
They need to start living a life of their own
I'm not your girlfriend, I'm not your wife
I'm just a vtuber
I'm just a vtuber
I'm just a vtuber
*************************
Last Donut
I was gone for only five minutes
When I got back, someone ate the last donut
Even though I said,
"Hey, can you save the last donut for me?"
They couldn't even do me this one favor
Those motherfuckers only think about themselves
Fuck them!
They can all eat shit and die
I want my donut right now
Someone better bring me a jelly donut
I'm not kidding, I'm going nuclear
Better stand back, I'm gonna blow
Just bring me my jelly donut
It's my god given right to eat a donut
I'm not kidding, I'm going nuclear
Better stand back, I'm gonna blow
I've calmed down, but I'm still mad as hell
No one ever looks out for me
I try to be nice and be considerate
But I never get the last donut
They couldn't even do me this one favor
Those motherfuckers only think about themselves
Fuck them!
They can all eat shit and die
I want my donut right now
Someone better bring me a jelly donut
I'm not kidding, I'm going nuclear
Better stand back, I'm gonna blow
Just bring me my jelly donut
It's my god given right to eat a donut
I'm not kidding, I'm going nuclear
Better stand back, I'm gonna blow
***********************
Ten Seconds
I'm sorry, but I won't be coming in today
There's a stream with Kronii, Fauna, and Mumei
I'm afraid you'll have to way until the stream is done
My priority in life is to have a lot of fun
They're really cute and funny, clever, and so smart
In just two years, they've secured a place in my heart
All my spare time is now reserved for Hololive
It's okay if always watching them leaves me sleep deprived
I'm writing comments hoping they'll be read aloud
But they never do, it hangs over me like a cloud
I'm afraid I'll have to spend some money for superchats
That's the only way for you to notice me, you little rat
My income's gone and money's getting really low
Should I sell my blood, that way I can raise some dough?
Don't forget I also want to buy some really cool merch
That's the price I pay for joining the Hololive church
Ten seconds, that's all I can get
After that, they'll just move on to whoever's next
They'll read my name, but that's about it
For those ten seconds, I feel alright for a little bit
My affirmations come in ten dollar chunks
If I quit cold turkey, I wouldn't last a month
Ten seconds, that's all I can get
After that, they'll just move on to whoever's next
They'll read my name, but that's about it
For those ten seconds, I feel I'm loved for a little bit
My affirmations come in ten dollar chunks
If I quit cold turkey, I wouldn't last a month
I wouldn't even last a day
I feel as though I'm getting really close to them
Is it cringe for me to say they're my only friends?
I know they don't know me from Adam but that's okay
Friends don't need to be made of fresh and blood in this day and age
I'd never go out to a karaoke bar
I don't have to 'cause IRyS sings while I play the guitar
All my spare time is now reserved for Hololive
It's okay if always watching them leaves me sleep deprived
Ten seconds, that's all I can get
After that, they'll just move on to whoever's next
They'll read my name, but that's about it
For those ten seconds, I feel alright for a little bit
My affirmations come in ten dollar chunks
If I quit cold turkey, I wouldn't last a month
No...
Ten seconds, that's all I can get
After that, they'll just move on to whoever's next
They'll read my name, but that's about it
For those ten seconds, I feel I'm loved for a little bit
My affirmations come in ten dollar chunks
If I quit cold turkey, I wouldn't last a month
So I think I'm gonna keep on buying
Those superchats are the only thing that keeps me from crying
I'm always ten seconds away
(I'm always)
ten seconds away
(I'm always)
ten seconds away
*********************
National Cow Appreciation Day
Hey, Mr. Cow, I just want to tell you
how much I appreciate you
You give us milk and let us eat you
Sorry about that
I just want to make sure you're comfortable
If you need something, just let me know
I've got some carrots as a treat just for you
Hey, Mr. Cow, I just want to tell you
how much I appreciate you
I don't even mind the constant farting
You do you
I just want to make sure you're comfortable
If you need something, just let me know
I've got some timothy hay just for you
Your flesh is delicious
Too bad we have to kill you for it
But one day we'll grow it in a lab
I hope you'll live to see it
I just want to make sure you're comfortable
If you need something, just let me know
I've got some juicy apples just for you
I just want to make sure you're comfortable
If you need something, just let me know
I'll give you all the fresh cut grass you want
***********************
Fat
I'm getting fat and I don't care
Would you mind passing me that bowl of gummi bears?
Oops, I just split my pants, so what?
I can fix that with a napkin to cover my butt
What are you looking at?
I'm not some goddamn animal in the zoo
I still have my dignity
Oh, look, someone dropped that Twinkie on the ground
It's my lucky day
Who wouldn't love a free Twinkie?
I was thin and I still never got anywhere
So I'll just be helping myself to my share
Oops, I just ate the whole cake, my bad
Oh well, no cake for you, sucks to be you
What are you looking at?
I'm not some goddamn animal in the zoo
I still have my dignity
Oh, look, someone dropped that HoHo on the ground
It's my lucky day
Who wouldn't love a free HoHo?
I'll take that
and I'll have some of that, too
You might as well give me everything
I never get anything
What are you looking at?
I'm not some goddamn animal in the zoo
I still have my dignity
Oh, look, someone dropped that Twinkie on the ground
It's my lucky day
Who wouldn't love a free Twinkie?
What are you looking at?
I'm not some goddamn animal in the zoo
I still have my dignity
Oh, look, someone dropped that HoHo on the ground
It's my lucky day
Who wouldn't love a free HoHo?
*********************
Shohei Ohtani
Shohei Ohtani slept with my poor mommy
and now I'm gonna have a baby sister
What's that you're saying? My mother is a liar?
Okay, I admit that she's a serial grifter
Part of me still clings to the hope that it could be true
Please, please, let it be true
I want Shohei to help me play in the Major Leagues
Please, please, that would be so cool
Shohei Ohtani, won't you marry mommy
and be the father I so desparately need
I'll be a good daughter and bring honor to your name
I'll stay in school and get good grades and still watch all your games
Part of me still clings to the hope that it could be true
Please, please, let it be true
I want Shohei to help me play in the Major Leagues
Please, please, that would be so cool
I would be the first ever woman
to play in the Major Leagues
I would have to be a knuckle baller
to have a chance to succeed
I promise to train very hard
I'll measure up to any bar
You'll be proud of me I swear
No rice, no life!
Shohei Ohtani slept with my poor mommy
and now I'm gonna have a baby sister
My whole life is a wreck, my mother passes bad checks
Ohtani san, please help me and assist her
Shohei Ohtani
please help my mommy
You're my only hope
I need some way to cope
Shohei Ohtani
Shohei Ohtani
*********************
I Wear a Mask to Hide My Ugly Face
You'll never catch me going out of my house
without my mask on, no you'll never see that
It's not because I'm afraid of catching the flu
That's not the reason, no that's not the reason
When I was born, I was hit with an ugly stick
That's what they told me, that's what everyone tells me
So you see I wear a mask to hide my ugly face
I don't want anyone to see me, sorry you can't see me
I spent my entire life hiding in a corner
Like some dog who's never been loved
You better be careful, don't stick your hand out
I just might bite it off
I wear a mask to hide my ugly face
It's for my protection, I can't stand the rejection
I've been told I need to stay in my place
The world's for the beautiful, and my ugliness is indisputable
This is the hand that I was dealt
I don't expect to receive anyone's help
Just go your own way while I tend to myself
When time has passed on, will anyone remember me?
They won't remember, no they won't remember
I'm no different from office furniture
I'm just some furniture, a piece of furniture
I spent my entire life hiding in a corner
Like some dog who's never been loved
You better be careful, don't stick your hand out
I just might bite it off
I wear a mask to hide my ugly face
It's for my protection, I can't stand the rejection
I've been told I need to stay in my place
The world's for the beautiful, and my ugliness is indisputable
This is the hand that I was dealt
I don't expect to receive anyone's help
Just go your own way while I tend to myself
I wear this mask to hide my ugly face
I don't fit in with the human race
All you ugly people out there know what I mean
We are not heard, and we sure as hell ain't seen
Ooooh...
I wear a mask to hide my ugly face
It's for my protection, I can't stand the rejection
I've been told I need to stay in my place
The world's for the beautiful, and my ugliness is indisputable
This is the hand that I was dealt
I don't expect to receive anyone's help
Just go your own way while I tend to myself
I don't expect to receive anyone's help
Just go your own way while I tend to myself
I wear my mask to hide my ugly face
I've long accepted that this is my place
**********************
Garden of Failure
Got my gloves and a floppy hat
and I put on a pair of worn out jeans
Gonna get my hands dirty, get 'em really dirty
Like an oil rig worker's hands
Prepping my garden takes a lot of work
but I'm gonna reap a bounty that will prove its worth
Gonna plant some beans, tomatoes, cucumbers
I'll be saving so much money
My daddy, he told me
hard work always pays off in the end
But my daddy was left a broken man
When his pension went down the can
You tell yourself, I'm prepared
I've got everything in the bag
But you don't know
It's all rigged against you
It's been a few weeks now and nothing's grown
All I've got is a pile of dirt and rocks
I guess I don't have a green thumb
I'm really clueless like that guy from Green Acres
My daddy, he told me
hard work always pays off in the end
But my daddy was left a broken man
When his pension went down the can
You tell yourself, I'm prepared
I've got everything in the bag
But you don't know
It's all rigged against you
You tell yourself, I've worked hard
I've done everything I'm supposed to do
But then you realize
You never stood a chance
It's not my fault
I didn't do anything wrong
I'm just a cog
I'm not in control
You tell yourself, I'm prepared
I've got everything in the bag
But you don't know
It's all rigged against you
You tell yourself, I've worked hard
I've done everything I'm supposed to do
But you don't know
It's all rigged against you
*******************
Nobody but You
I just picked up my pizza
and I was walking back to my car
when this kid came up to me
and asked if he could have a slice
I just looked at him and told him fuck off
Who the fuck are you to think you could
come up to me and ask me for a slice of my pizza?
I don't even know you, you're just a total stranger to me
You little brat
I work hard every week
I think I deserve to treat myself to a pizza
If you want a pizza, too
then get a fucking job like the rest us
I don't care if you're only ten years old
That's not my fucking problem
Go ask your stupid parents for a pizza
and leave me the hell alone
I learn my lesson long ago
There ain't gonna be anyone to help you
Anything you get in life is gonna be
Through your own hard work that you do
You're on your own, don't ever depend on friends
They'll never have your back, that's just a dead end
Nobody's ever gonna help you
You gotta learn you're the only one you can rely on
There's some guy in the parking lot asking for
bus fare so he can get back home to his cat
How'd you get out here, then, with no cash?
This sound like bullshit
I just looked at him and told him fuck off
Who the fuck are you to think you could
come up to me and try to scam me with some bullshit story
I don't even know you, you're just a total stranger to me
I learn my lesson long ago
There ain't gonna be anyone to help you
Anything you get in life is gonna be
because of you, and nobody else but you
You're on your own, don't ever depend on friends
They'll never have your back, that's just a dead end
Nobody's ever gonna help you
You gotta learn you're the only one you can rely on
I learn my lesson long ago
There ain't gonna be anyone to help you
Anything you get in life is gonna be
because of you, and nobody else but you
You're on your own, don't ever depend on friends
They'll never have your back, that's just a dead end
Nobody's ever gonna help you
You gotta learn you're the only one you can rely on
I learn my lesson long ago
There ain't gonna be anyone to help you
Anything you get in life is gonna be
because of you, and nobody else but you
You're on your own, don't ever depend on friends
They'll never have your back, that's just a dead end
Nobody's ever gonna help you
You gotta learn you're the only one you can rely on
********************
Free
I hold in my hands
The key to my happiness
I'm talking about this little lottery ticket
I know it's gonna come through for me
Just you wait, I'm gonna be a winner
I'm gonna buy me a big house
With so many rooms,
I'm gonna sleep in a different room every night
And when I wake up in the morning
I'll be feeling right
'Cause I'll be free
The way I was meant to be